Love… A Choice?
February 12, 2010
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| Amonyesh at the Drop-In Center |
Do you know how some children are just lovable the first time you lay eyes on them? I have that experience a lot here in Ethiopia as I meet the children that CHE ministers to. There’s Begidu, who may possibly be the cutest little boy ever or Metu who instantly charms you with her smile and jovial personality. Love for them just came easy for me, despite some of their very unlovable behaviors.
There are other children though, who seem hard to love at first. Maybe it’s their appearance, or their expressions, or their defensiveness – I’m honestly not always sure why. One such child for me was Amonyesh. I remember the first time I met her. She came into the Drop-In Center one day in 2008 and wanted me to push her on the tire swing and I did not want to (I know, how childish!). I was already playing with some of the other children, but I decided to stop what I was doing and push her on the swing.
It was that way up until about a month ago; always choosing to show her attention and love despite not really wanting to. Then, one day in January she came up to me with her big smile and asked me to treat her already healed wound (a common occurrence at the Center, especially for Amonyesh) and something changed. I actually felt love for her. As I faux-treated her healed wound I noticed how sweet Amonyesh was and how funny she could be. I felt like I had been missing something the whole time I’d known her. I honestly do not know what changed other than the fact that I had persistently chosen to show her love despite not feeling like it and finally the feelings followed.
Just last week I got the chance to visit with Amonyesh’s mom and two sisters in their small one room home. Amonyesh told me that she wanted to be a doctor one day so she could help poor people in Ethiopia. I asked her what influenced this decision and her response surprised me. She said it was because of people, like me, who helped her with her wounds and when she was sick. All those times when I begrudgingly cleaned her minor (and I mean very minor) wounds really had impacted her. In that instant I had an ah-ha moment and the saying, “Love is not just a feeling, but it’s a choice,” finally made real sense to me. Thank God I had chosen to love Amonyesh when I had not wanted to, otherwise I would have missed out on finding her friendship and even playing a part in inspiring her to also love others.
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9 Responses to “Love… A Choice?”
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Thanks for sharing this Joe! What a great reminder to make that choice! It was just what I needed to hear today.
Thanks for the reminder. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who finds it hard to love sometimes. I’m glad God loves us before we ever loved Him. Thank you for all you’re doing. ‘Praying for you!
Joe – I think you are just being more honest that most of us are willing to be. Here’s a quote from a book that I have read over and over: “The life of faith consists entirely in this incessant battle with the senses.” I remember Amonyesh. I thought she was very pretty. I am glad she is being touched by the ministry. Tom
Joe,
This is just the beginning. Amonyesh will need your help more ever than now. The idea of helping someone and the reality of being able to do so in such a destitute country will require a great sacrifice on her part and yours. She is just a child but many a great healer had decided at an early age to help others. Moreover, nurturing her spiritually will provide her with strength when she thinks she has none, grace where none may currently exist, and love for everyone.
I hope I am making sense.
Isn’t it odd how the Lord utilizes the trust of a small child to show us as adults that we love someone when we may not realize it?
Stay strong… I’m praying for you and your family.
George
Thank you Joe and Karyn for sharing such a meaningful story!!!
That was beautifully put, Joe! Thank you so much for your openness & for sharing that story with us all. What a wonderful reminder & thank you for the encouragement about chosing to love people even when we don’t feel like it – we will most likely never know how much those choices truly impact others (but it is awesome to get to see how it has touched others at times too!).
I praise God that you are allowing HIM to be master and not your flesh that says ‘I don’t want to” . And I agree with Tom ‘you are being more honest that I am with my own feelings’. thanks for sharing such a wise insight. It is our choice.
all my love to thefourbridges…oops now its five!
What a nice story Joe. I think we have all felt this way at one time or another. I have struggled with the same thing with a little girl in our Sunday School class. Your story really hit home and has encouraged me to choose to love her. It is amazing what you are doing with these children and it is nice to see a glimpse of that. Love you guys!!!
This story shows the true Love of Christ, Joe. Thank you for sharing with us. It could be just as important in marriage.